Three Choices When Someone Is Being Unkind

Personal & Social Development · Responsible Decision-Making · ages 7-9

Name ______________________ Date ____________

What does an upstander do when they see someone being treated unfairly?
- Watches and says nothing
- Speaks up or gets help
- Joins in
Someone sees a classmate being teased and just watches without helping. What is this person called?
- A bystander
- An upstander
- A teacher
A bystander and an upstander do the exact same thing when they see something unkind happening.
Circle one: True False
Jade sees a group teasing a new student. She isn't sure it's safe to say something out loud. What else could she do?
- Walk away with the new student and include them
- Join the group so they stop teasing her too
- Do nothing because it isn't her problem
Which of these is a safe action an upstander can take?
- Yelling at the whole group alone
- Joining in so the group likes you
- Telling a trusted adult what happened
Why is telling a trusted adult a good upstander action, even if you don't say anything to the group in the moment?
- Because telling an adult means you did nothing
- Because adults can help stop what's unsafe
- Because it's the same as joining in
Priya remembers a time her big sister told friends 'stop it' when they were teasing someone, then invited that person to sit with them. What did Priya's sister do?
- Acted as an upstander
- Acted as a bystander
- Joined in the teasing
Marcus says, 'I didn't laugh at Sam, so I wasn't part of the problem.' What does Marcus not understand?
- Marcus is right, watching is never part of the problem
- Only the person laughing is ever responsible
- Staying silent and doing nothing can still let unkindness continue

Answer key

For grown-ups. Fold this page away before handing over the rest.

Three Choices When Someone Is Being Unkind W1-mt_yCmYV9ruQu-s1

Speaks up or gets help · An upstander takes some kind of safe action to help, instead of staying silent or joining in.
A bystander · A bystander sees unkindness happen and does not step in to help.
False · A bystander does nothing. An upstander helps. Those are different choices.
Walk away with the new student and include them · Including the person being targeted and walking away together is a safe upstander action, even without confronting the group.
Telling a trusted adult what happened · Telling a trusted adult is one of the safest ways to help without facing a group alone.
Because adults can help stop what's unsafe · Telling an adult is a real action that can help, even though it happens after the moment instead of during it.
Acted as an upstander · Speaking up and including the person being targeted is a real example of standing up for someone.
Staying silent and doing nothing can still let unkindness continue · Not joining in is better than joining in, but staying silent as a bystander still lets the unkindness continue unchallenged.